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  • Writer's pictureJill Kolstad, M.Ed.

Scripts to End Every Homework Fight

Steer your child through her nightly homework load — without being the bad guy or doing all the work — with these ADHD-proof conversation guides.

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The Homework Hurdles

Every child with ADHD experiences his or her own unique set of super powers and challenges. But one common thread unites all families living with attention deficit and learning disabilities: a hatred of homework.

The fact is, most parents in your shoes are exhausted from the repetitive fights, the missing assignments, and the hours and hours of wasted time. You know your child is smart and capable — which makes it extra frustrating when he delays starting a straightforward assignment, turns in work that’s incomplete, or forgets assignments altogether. Homework becomes a daily reminder of struggles and setbacks.

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Taskmaster Trouble

When your child’s work doesn’t match up with his skills and intelligence, you might fall into the unrelenting role of “homework police.” As your child’s daily taskmaster, you’re nagging, poking, prodding, and cajoling on a nearly constant basis — which is awful for everyone. Micromanaging your child’s nightly workload won’t teach him any necessary life skills or help him learn. In fact, it’s likely to lead to resentment — and more homework fights in the long run!

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A Better Role for Parents

“Strict supervisor” is not your only option. What you can (and should) do instead is set up routines and external structures that will help your child develop her executive functions and find the confidence to get her work done herself — without constant nagging. How can you do this? By providing guidance, offering support, and asking the right questions. Follow these scripts to get started on your healthier homework trajectory.

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